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Dancing With the Stars Makes Amends With Our Battered Hearts

March 29, 2011

DWTS is back! Okay, it was back last week. I watched but didn’t realize there wouldn’t be an elimination show on Tuesday, so I missed the recap window. Here’s a quick one: twelve new celebrities – some of them kinda famous! – showed up and it felt a bit more like the early seasons of the show, with neither political figureheads nor clear frontrunners in the mix. Oh, and Kirstie Alley busted out some killer footwork in cha-cha heels (literally!).

Now, onto Week Two.

Sugar Ray Leonard started off the night as the sacrificial dancer, scoring 6-5-6 from the judges, which seemed only a tiny bit harsh. Kendra the Playboy bunny came up next, and if she can stand up straighter – to balance out those “chesticles” Len referred to – she will be a better ballroom dancer, but I’m not sure how far she’ll go with voters. Hugh Hefner was in the audience (fulfilling his contractual obligation to appear every other season? ‘Cause seriously he pops up a lot.) Chelsea and Mark did way “too much messin’ about” in their Panic! At the Disco inspired jive that wasn’t very jivey, but she’s a cute young Disney star and will ride this out, she is looking good for the finals, though certainly not a shoe-in. A lot of people are ‘good’ and no one is ‘amazing’, so there’s still a lot of opportunity for growth and failing in the next few weeks!

Ok, so Chris Jericho and Cheryl Burke came out with a quickstep, earning them 8-7-8, the highest score so far of the night, and I gotta say, I’m with Carrie Ann, I’m feeling Chris Jericho. Professional wrestling might be a perfect skillset match for ballroom dancing – both combine equal parts physicality and performance, both are condescended with frequency. Then Petra the model came out and I saw a tall amazon lady who doesn’t quite know what to do with her body. The judges scared me with lots of praising, but then doled out a 6-6-6. Kirstie and Maks followed, and they weren’t as good as last week, there were a couple explicit errors, but it wasn’t bad either, and they properly scored them higher than Petra and Dmitri, which I was concerned about (Len often overscores pretty blond models, though Petra is a brunette, so perhaps it gets mitigated). Mike the Loveline guy came out with touch more humility and hard work – he was still lousy, but he was not as lousy as last week!

Then there’s Romeo. Oh, Romeo. Romeo who last week essentially sneered at having to move his hips because that is feminine. Seriously? Wait, he is an adolescent boy, as we were reminded last night when he busted out with “I was born in the 90s, so…..” but I don’t know what the ‘so’ was because I was yelling “people born in the 90s are old enough to be on TV??!” So Romeo was just eh last week, and this week I thought he did a bit better, but the judges fawned over him so much, I had to watch the dance again and see what I missed. Give it a look.

He was alright, but the routine was kinda boring, the feet weren’t on point, he sometimes seemed a 1/4 beat behind. But they looooved him, he got 7-8-8, the same as Chris Jericho. Wendy Williams danced next and she too improved over last week, her personality came out much more, but unfortunately her dancing is still not so great. Ralph “Dorian Gray” Macchio who had the highest score last week danced a jive that I thought was pretty strong (and he’s not even my favorite!).

The judges were hard on him for having too much energy and being a bit out of control, then gave him straight 7s. I’m not sure he did any worse that Romeo, but ultimately he’ll keep going;  I think Macchio has the potential to be this season’s Donny Osmond. The last couple to dance was Hines and Kym, who have great chemistry and potential; they tied with Romeo and Jericho for the highest score of the night, with two 8s and a 7.

Tonight is the results show, featuring a performance by, um, Chris Brown. Oops. I’ll be tuning in for the last 5 minutes to see who will get eliminated, then will report back to Pop Morsels tomorrow.

5 Comments leave one →
  1. Sandra permalink
    March 29, 2011 10:28 am

    I’m back too! I thought Kristie was so good with her cha-cha. She is my favorite (even though she’s a scientologist – does that make me bad?). I missed you Dancing with the Stars! Please no more theatrics. Just give me your innocuous barely-stars and I’ll watch again and again.

    • March 29, 2011 10:55 am

      I am honestly hoping that this might be what brings Kirstie Alley some peace, after publicly battling with herself for so many years. And I think she and Maks are a good fit, he’s surprisingly tender with her at moments while also working her hard. Their personalities could match well too, though I’m sure they’ll be at least one meltdown fight before the season is over.

    • March 29, 2011 10:55 am

      p.s. so glad you’re back too!!

  2. hsofia permalink
    March 29, 2011 7:45 pm

    I had no idea Kirstie Alley was SIXTY years old? Wow, that cha cha was great. Her footwork was fast and she was moved around the floor so well. And I LOLed at your “Dorian Gray” comment re Ralph Macchio.

  3. March 29, 2011 9:18 pm

    Kirstie Alley is FIERCE. She is very graceful. She is very studied. I like the attention she gives each steps without looking like she’s doing that. I’m rooting for her to go all the way.

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