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Charlie and the Cocaine Factory

January 28, 2011

What is that like a people's choice award?

Charlie Sheen’s brief case filled with cocaine apparently wasn’t the cause of his frantic dash to the emergency room yesterday. These coke fueled, hooker binges are becoming redundant. Oh Charlie Sheen. You must be making your father regret daily that you didn’t opt for a stage name. All the hard work Martin has done to elevate the name “Sheen” Charlie seems hellbent on destroying. The alleged wife beating, substance abusing douchebag has once again run afoul of the law. These Charlie Sheen coke fueled tom foolery articles just write themselves. Of course, Sheen is heading back to work on his crappy sitcom. Xena forbid, he let some coke and ho fuckery interfere with making that paper! Sheen was reportedly hospitalized due to complications from excessive laughter. I can’t do all the work for you. You’ll need to generate your own joke about his unfunny sitcom.

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5 Comments leave one →
  1. January 28, 2011 1:32 pm

    From the Gothamist article:

    His spin man has said the whole ordeal was just “an adverse allergic reaction to some medication”

    Someone call the jackal and tell him how sick he is.

  2. January 28, 2011 2:50 pm

    Someone call the jackal and tell him how sick he is.

    HAHAHA. Change the headline; change the story.

  3. January 28, 2011 2:53 pm

    I can picture Sheen confronting the constabulary with “who are you sons of bitches?”

  4. January 28, 2011 3:15 pm

    Anyone have a beer, cause I could party…

  5. January 29, 2011 10:48 am

    Only Charlie Sheen can make dying a slow death look fun.

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